IF AT FIRST YOU DON'T SUCCEED.....

I'm the type of person that hates to fail and disappoint not only others but myself. I know I can't be the only one out there that feels this way, however I may be the only one who isn't afraid to express and share these feelings.

Growing up in a very active family, my brothers along with myself have always been competitive and very goal orientated. I have always been fearless and never cared what others think. But when it comes to failing or disappointment, I have never handled that very well.  I hate(d) facing people thinking they would think less of me or even look at myself in the mirror because all I would see is a disappointment and a failure. And I think over the years I have took that to heart and never wanted people to feel disappointed in me or think I am a failure.

So regardless of how my life would be or what toll it would take on me I would/have taken on a lot more than I could/can chew. All because I don't want to see disappointment in the eyes of others. I struggle daily to try climb over this fear but no matter how strong I think I am to climb over I keep slipping and can't find the strength to do so.

I am learning each day that failing isn't always failing along with disappointment. Failing can mean that you simply just aren't there yet and that it will take practice and time to get it right and to not just automatically convince yourself that you failed because you couldn't succeed to the fullest that first time. You have to take a step back and look on what you did manage to learn, grow or progress from that attempt and take that and move forward and reattempt later.

As far as disappointment, you have to learn that you can only control your feelings and no one else. And if someone is disappointed with you and you are honestly at fault. Apologize and move on. It isn't worth beating yourself up over it.  If people are disappointed in a way because they wish you would have done this and not that, that is on them and not you. You can only make yourself happy and you can't please everyone.  As much as we want to please everyone and not disappoint, you can't go on living your life for others or you will never truly be happy.

{end of rant}

♥XO{ST}